Been a while since last post, however, since recently coming out of contemplative retreat over the weekend. I have come to realize I need to a more of a fool for God then trying to be this person I'm not meant to be.
When reading and reflecting some books I read during that retreat, one from a Jesuit priest about 5 spiritual pillars and the other from St. Therese the little child; it's been revealed to me by being more little and excepting the weaknesses I have, only then I can reach by grace of God the highest desire, and some how sustain or jump back and forth to be in that level of love and follow the beatitudes.
I know it will be a battle, and just looking out how KD got injured recently during latest NBA final's game, can't help to wonder how a player like KD took the risk to play for rest of the team and then went down hard as he did, not knowing now what his future playing days could be. I hope and pray his injury is not a serious one, but the whole point is when you risk putting it on the line, it can be hard and suffering involved.
Eventually their will be consolation and then you see how God can touch you during those tough moments, and only then God will know your heart and bring you in more to him and give you that healing.
Lord, may I also put it all on the line for you, may I risk my own ego desires to instead be a fool for you.